Tis the season.

Nothing says Merry Christmas like anonymously donating 30 pounds of candy corn to a toy/clothing drive.

The children are the bleak, bleak future.

Kid 1: What do you want for Christmas?

Kid 2: A German stripper!

Me: Is your sister here today?

Kid: No. She had some beer and didn't feel good today.

Me: You are telling me your sister drank beer last night and now is too sick to be at school today?

Kid: Yes.

Me: You know I don't believe you, right?

Kid: Here's what really happened. You know that ball she has?

Me: No.

Kid:Well, I accidentally threw it and hit her in the face. Her nose was bleeding.

Kid: I'm sad for you. You're never going to find love and never going to be happy.

Me: I think you are mistaking romance with fulfillment.

Kid: I know. That's why you're never going to be happy.

I constantly have to ask for people's names.

Me: Well it took a little longer because I forgot to turn on London St. so I had to go back around to drop off people.

Br. Mike: Your memory is terrible lately. Do we need to get you some ginseng or something?

I then explained how I tend to be somewhat absentminded... I think.

My new bff

Chuck: "I don't drink champagne. That's for women and kids."

Learning Curve

Lucy: "(Speaking to me in Spanish)"

Me: (interrupting) "Lucy, I don't speak Spanish."

Lucy: "(Continues speaking Spanish and ends with a question)?"

Me: "Lucy, I... I still don't speak Spanish."

Medical Advice

Br. Mike: You need to go outside.

Br. Ben: How long have you had this cold. 2 or 3 weeks?

Me: Only a little over a week.

Br. Mike: Seriously, go outside. I know you hate it but you need to be in the sun and burn away your sickness. It's God's medicine.

Morrissey Saves a Turkey (Sketches and Excerpts)

Turkey: Do you think it's possible for a man and a turkey to be in love?

Morrissey: How could you ask me that?

Turkey: Because you told me to! You kept insisting 'ask me! ask me! ask me!' Based on subtly in your phrasing I assumed that's what you wanted me to ask.

Morrissey: Turkey?!?

Turkey: What?

Morrissey: Yes, I think a man can love a turkey.

Morrissey Saves a Turkey (Sketches)

Turkey Sketch #1

Scene where turkey tries wearing disguises.

Morrissey: No one will recognize you now.

Turkey: I just feel foolish with this haircut.

Morrissey: Trust me. It looks good.

Morrissey fights Robot Space Ninjas

(Editor's note- drawing might be too believable- scare kids?)

Breakfast with the Brothers

Br: (to me) It's amazing their philosophical discipline in the pursuit of truth. Of course many of them died young because the topic weighs on you. So take it seriously just not too seriously.

85 year-old Brother: (to me) I like your sweater. I have one just like it.

Br 1: We thought of you often. What did you do last night?

Br 2: What do you think we did. We got roaring drunk and ran around.

Br 1: Next time I'll try thinking in Italian.

Br 2: Next time just try thinking.

After several sexual innuendos by the waitress.

Br: Well we're religious brothers.

Waitress: And I'm a nun.

More sexual innuendos by the waitress.

The waitress realizes that the Brothers are actually Brothers and educated her son.

Waitress: I am so sorry Brothers. I hope you're okay.

Br: Completely scandalized.

Music

Random Br.: The bassoon is played with two hands you ass!

The Brothers hate Black Friday

Highlights from Thanksgiving Breakfast

Br. Mike: All these Hermans camping out to shop at 3 in the morning.

Br. Ben: Eventually we'll stop celebrating holidays because we'll be too busy shopping.

Br. Ben: The paper is over four pounds and has 160 inserts. They were talking about it on the news.

Br. Mike: I have never bought a watch. At one point I had four watches. I just wore a different one every week. I didn't know what else to do with them.

Me: You had too much time on your hands?

Br. Mike: (pauses, smiles) Very good.

Br. Mike: (looking at ads) They sell everything. Are they selling babies? Look at this. 60% off babies.

Me: Brother... I think it's probably the baby clothes.

Br. Mike: Ah, yes. That makes more sense.

Death

Br. Mike: We would sing as we would process the body to the grave. Every Religious Order has their special ceremony. Nobody just throws the body and runs.

Music Award Show

Br. Ben: "I know this song. This is a remake. ...He's got to be sweating like a pig in that jacket."

-Bro Ben's response to Black Eyed Peas.

Br. Mike: "(to me) I guess this is your type of music here, Herman*."

-This is in reference to the nominees for Best Latin Pop Artist. I am still not sure if he was joking.

*Br. Mike often calls people Herman instead of their real name. Other Brothers when they taught would just call kids "you" if they didn't know their name in the classroom. Br. Mike started referring to kids as "Herman" because it was a proper name and at least it "gave them (the kids) some dignity." He still continues this practice.

Maybe the problem isn't the Education System

Kid 1: Your beard and mustache look better.

Me: Yeah. I guess they are filling in.

Kid 1: Can I have your mustache?

Kid 2: Can I have your beard!?!?

Kid: I have a nickname for Brian.

Me: Is it a nice nickname?

Kid: (silence) ... It' Brianna.

Kid 1: Can I have gum?

Me: On one condition- you stop counting to one every time I tell you to hold on for one second.

Kid 1: Deal

Kid 2: Can I have some gum?

Me: Sure.

Kid 1: Why doesn't she have a condition?

Me: She never gives me a hard time.

Kid 1: She hates you.

Me: But she's very polite about it.

I'm not sure how to respond.

I took a friend and his family to the airport today. When I returned home there was a box of tampons in my bathroom trash can. Florida is a mysterious place.

These things happen.

I like the peculiarity of existence. If previous moments are considered as what have led to the current then everything is far more entertaining.

1990- I tell my mom after my first day of first grade that it was "The greatest day of my life."

1994- Long division finally makes sense.

1995- Have a compelling existential experience which I am incapable of expressing properly until I am in college and have read Sartre.

1997- Almost get in my first fight. I drew on the back of kids neck with a marker.

2000- Write first song about a girl. Cliches read it and tell me it is crap.

2002- Qualify for nationals in Speech and Debate

2003- Finally am able to explain existential experience I had when I was little.

2008- Travel cross-country on a train. Jump on a train to kiss a girl good bye. Perhaps one of the boldest moments of my life.

2010- In a grocery store with a 63 year-old Mexican woman as she compares packages of ground beef while The National is playing on the in store radio.

This seems like a natural progression.

I thought it was funny

-A blind priest said, "Sorry I didn't see you there."

-A guy talking to the owner funeral parlors that needs a knee replacement.

FP Owner: I think I'll be able to get a new knee.

Guy: In your profession I would imagine you have a quite a selection of knees you could get.

Experience informs our Actions.

Br. Mike- I stopped by last night when I heard you get back in. I assumed after spending all day with those middle and high schoolers you could use a drink but I couldn't find you.

Me- I was in my room.

Br. Mike- Oh. Very good.

I'm learning so much

Guy talking about Chastity: "You don't put two cookies in an oven and then they make small cookies. That's not how it works."

Internal monologue: "That's not how it works? Everything my parents told me about cooking is a lie."

I still owe the library in Charleston $10.

I was sent to pick up some educational videos for the after school program and discovered in the children's/adolescents' section the Bonita Springs public library's collection of comic books. I picked up the original run of Iron Man and have to return it by Monday. Never did I consider I might ever have the thought, "I have so much Iron Man to read before the weekend is over if I don't want a late charge." I'm learning a lot about myself in Florida.

Creepy park bench statue or Creepiest park bench statue

A description of the Bench which is named "The Secret Bench of Knowledge."

-At first glance, it is a pair of children sit­ting on a bench; he is eating a bright red apple and whispering some thing in her ear; she is squirming, ever so slightly, perhaps at his words, perhaps because he is too close, or perhaps she just doesn’t like to sit still. The tourist brochures will tell you that the sculpture bears a message of the joy and value of reading.

The boy is holding an apple that has a bite missing. Clearly this is a reference to Adam and Eve and the tree of knowledge. The sculptor is making the claim that the apple was good because it brought forth reason and discovery. First, too bad the Gnostics beat you to that claim thousands of years ago. Second, surely there was a less creepy version you could have created.

The original owners of the bench wanted to rid themselves of the monstrosity because in short it creeped them out. The worst part- Bonita Springs raised $57,000 to buy the thing. That's right- the place I am living spent $57,000 on a park bench while a shelter to help the poor has been repeatedly shot down because it might be an eyesore at the proposed location.

Terrifying.

Simply Terrifying.

To lighten the mood, here are some pictures of the Florida sky.

Br. Mike: Well you see people used to keep them as pets and then would just let them go into the everglades when they got too big.

Me: People would just let pythons go into the wild?

Br. Mike: Eventually, the state put out a hunting mandate because the pythons would eat cats and dogs and attacked a couple of children. Never killed a kid but attacked them.

In the past week I have found out that Florida has a problem with pythons and wild dogs in domestic areas. What is wrong with this state?

I'm not sure that makes it okay.

Br. Ben: (addressing small child) What happened to your hair?

Guy: He was scalped....

My internal monologue: Please don't finish that thought. Please don't finish that thought. You must stop there.

Guy: ...probably by....

My internal monologue: He's going to say it. Please don't say it. Please realize it's inappropriate. I'm certain you mean no harm by the words but know you shouldn't say it. There are absolutely no words you can say to redeem what you've started.

Guy: ...some redskins.

Me:

Guy: (sees my expression)... I mean Native Americans.

Me:

The Mystery of the Wet Pants

Last night I went to take out some recycling and found my neighbor intoxicated, urinating on his house with the back of his pants soaked. Some mysteries aren't worth solving. This mystery being why?

It's nice to know I'm in good company.

Br. Mike: What happened?

Josh: There was a woman that was making inappropriate advances.

Br. Mike: (silently considering) ...Jesus had the same problem. I wouldn't worry about it.

Don't call him a hero. (Or the downfall of constant news coverage)

He finally asked what so many have been so afraid to speak out loud.

Warcraft Fan Schools game's maker.

Highlight of article

-Either way, he's gotten props from gamers for having the nerve -- and the know-how -- to verbally spar with Blizzard. I might have missed the verbal sparring because it seems the kid pointed out a mistake. This isn't exactly the Lincoln-Douglas debates. This would be like me calling out George Lucas on Han Solo shooting first.

Me- George, remember how Han Solo shot first?

George- No, he didn't.

Me- Yeah he did. Watch the movie.

George- Oh my bad.

(some theorize a conversation similar to this is actually responsible for the re-releases and the "digital enhancements" in the late 90's)

-"Good for him! It probably took a lot to get himself up to that microphone and to speak in a clear voice like that," said commenter Diamond Drogg. And he did all of this while standing?!? Surely he must be some kind of wizard!

-Youtube commenter 7lip agrees. A valid source indeed- the youtube commentators. A collective of individuals known for their intelligent analysis and only slightly blatant sexism, homophobia, and racism.

Other potential titles for the article.

-Man gains respect of thousands of Warcraft fans. Ladies still manage to show restraint.

-Lonely? Not this Lonely.

-Blogger keeps job one more day by posting least historically significant article ever written. Record setting still counts as news.

- Western Civilization continues its dedication to excellence.

So you lift the knee, do a little hop, and then lift the other knee? That is simple!

You ever have those days where you youtube.com the running man to illustrate how funny that would be if you did it in the background of any situation and you just end up watching clips from the movie the running man starring Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger?

Living in community is like being a child again

Br. Mike: Be sure to put on a hat when you ride your bike. You got a little sun on your face. Looked like you might burst into flames.

During this time I was kicking rocks with my shoulders slumped saying, "None of the other guys' Brothers make them wear hats."

Though hoped Brother did not responded with, "Well I'm not the other guys' Brother."

Booked my Flight for Christmas

Me: "So the flight will cost about 71 dollars."

Brother Mike: "71 dollars each way. That must be a small plane."

Me: "No, it's 71 dollars total."

Brother Mike: "Total? They probably have you sitting on a wing or something. My God... probably make you dust crops on the way up."

Once upon a time in Florida.

So I have to tell people often why I am volunteering in Florida. The first few times I told the story it allowed me to open up to people and all that stuff. Now I think I've shared enough. New strategy- See if I can recreate famous movies/stories as my personal narrative.

Josh Wars

Stranger: Why are you volunteering?

Josh: Well I was raised by my aunt and uncle and my uncle bought and sold robots.

Stranger: Robots?

Josh: Uhhh... computers. Anyway, so we got some robo... computers and they were owned by this guy that lived in the area. Long story short, my aunt and uncle were murdered and the guy taught me the for... about religion and now I volunteer.

Stranger: That's quite the story.

Josh: It becomes less interesting when I am captured by hairy midgets that are essential in defeating the empire.

Joshy Potter

Stranger: So what brings you to these parts?

Josh: See this scar on my forehead. My mom protected me when I was little from this guy and was killed and now I have this scar. So my parents are dead and I live with my aunt and uncle that neglect me. Also, The guy that killed my parent wants to kill me so I am in Florida to train up so that I can defeat him. By defeat I mean kill... also I've wanted to kill the guy since I was like 13. Also, all the father figures I have had have been killed and I seem to blame myself.

Stranger: That's pretty messed up.

Josh: I know. Think that is messed up? Imagine if it was a series of books aimed at kids.

(Fun Fact- I actually have a scar on my forehead. A bed frame gave me the business when I was a kid so I got a running start and then head butted it. Taught that bed some humility.)

SpiderJosh

Stranger: Why are you in Florida?

Josh: I was bitten by a radioactive spider.

Stranger: You aren't even trying anymore, are you?

Josh: Not at all.

Things I enjoy about Florida

- The sky is always epic (not in the "epic" meaning cool way but epic as in Wagner epic- large and overwhelming to the senses). The lack of hills allows one to see for miles and there are always clouds.

- I have met a lot of people from various demographics. No matter background, income, or faith some people are wonderful people and others are terrible. This seems like important information.

- There is something nice about the demystification of human relationships. Honesty allows for a greater understanding of truth and more completely reveals higher concepts such as love and beauty.

- There have been two incidental references to Sandman by Neil Gaimon. 1) Once Brother Mike accidentally woke me up from a nap and apologized for distrurbing Morpheus (this was a reference to Greek mythology but I immediately thought of Sandman). 2) The kids play a game of words on the bus. The point is to name an animal or thing that can beat the other person's. This goes back and forth until a person concedes or can not think of a superior alternative. This game was played by the Sandman in Hell with a lesser demon. One of my favorite parts of the series.

- I listen to music a lot.

- I miss my friends and family. This might not seem like something one enjoys but I can't really think of a time previous to this when I have actually missed anyone. I have disliked places and have wanted to leave. I have wanted comfort in what is familiar. I can't remember missing people and being happy/content in my current location. It's new and that makes it sort of exciting.

- I am reading a book called Transcending All Understanding and the Star Wars graphic novels. Both have rich insight into the human condition and the importance of stories and the lives we construct. Also, one has lightsabers. It's difficult not to enjoy that.

Francis

So I think I might try to adopt a feral kitten that lives outside in the bushes in front of my house. I've named him Francis. Not after the Saint but after Black Francis of the Pixies because the cat is all black and hates Kim Deal. I felt an immediate affection for it. I imagine this is how parents feel when they first see their kids... hypothetically... if babies were homeless. Crazy homeless babies.

It's like all my dreams are coming true.

I think I found my Old Best Friend. There have been candidates but none that really shined. The new guy shines like Kanye.

The Facts

- In his 70's

- Talks trash... constantly

- Had the following conversation.

"You haven't been right since Woodstock. (looks at me) If he heard there was something for free he would just hop in line. His mind has been a mess since."

"I was 12 when Woodstock happened."

"(shakes head) ...Tragic."

- Plays bingo

- Is basically the Fonz of Southwest Florida.

Sometimes it is better just to check the Catechism

Kid: So what happens if you don't call a priest "Father?"

Me: You'll probably go to Hell.

Kid: (Yelling across the room to the guy in charge) Mr. Josh told me I'm going to Hell!

Me: (Yelling across the room to the guy in charge) I stand by my words!

Still having troubles with the transition to working with Elementary school students.

Journalistic Integrity

"Eighty year-old man happy to be known by family, friends as 'Happy Hooker.'"

This is an actual headline taken from the Naples Daily News. I don't know who is in charge of editing the paper but this was definitely done on purpose.

On Bread (the non-eternal one)

Br. Ben: That roll is rolling away.

Me: I guess it's living up to its name.

(several minutes pass)

Br. Ben: Ha! I just got that.

Apparently terrible puns were all I needed to connect with the Brothers.

Reconsider procreation

Some of the conversations and statements from the after school program/tutoring.

Kid- "Are you trying to grow a mustache?"

Me- "No."

Kid- "When you don't shave you look like you are trying to grow a mustache."

"You look bad. You should shave."

"Why do you wear so many blue shirts?"

"Your music in really bad."

Kid- "Sitting is boring."

Me- "Read a book."

Kid- "Reading a book is only less boring."

Kid- "I threw the pencil. Not her."

Me- "So when you were sitting three feet away and I saw her throw the pencil- that was you?"

Kid- "... yes?"

Kid- "Are you wearing the same pants that you wore yesterday."

Me- "Yes. They are jeans."

Kid- "You should change your pants more."

"She cried because of you. She's going to hate you forever."

"Do you even know how to do math?"

Me- "You added all these problems. The directions say to subtract."

Kid- "BUT I DON'T WANT TO SUBTRACT!"

Me- "You didn't listen so you are going to have to sit out for 5 minutes."

Kid- "I thought you said 3?"

Me- "No. Five minutes."

Kid- "Okay. I'm going to count. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, (minutes pass) 98, 99, 100. How many minutes has it been."

Me- "It has been two minutes."

Kid- "Oh... 1, 2, 3..."

"You look bad is glasses."

"You have four eyes."

"Wear contacts. You'll look better."

"You look weird without glasses. You should wear your glasses."

Tree and knowledge and such

My senior year of high school I once objected in a National Art Honor Society meeting on the grounds of "this is arts and crafts, not art." I was obnoxious in high school but time teaches us humility. I made a tree.

I was afraid of posting rules like this. I thought the kids would interpret the falling leaves with rules written on them as a declaration of the death of authority and assume the decorations were a social commentary focusing on the death of custom and the end of values such as "nice words", "be kind", and "remember manners." Or that's what I thought until I found out most of the kids didn't know the difference between before and after.

It happens to the best of us.

"I didn't think you would be back so soon. I thought I would have time to iron," said the pantsless man in my living room.

It's only rock and roll but I like it... and please stop picking on me. You're only 7.

At 26 years-old I have reached a point that I am fairly confident in who I am. Some might object to the who I am that I have chosen but that's really inconsequential to me- hence the confidence. Today that confidence was shaken. I was listening to music before picking up the kids. Since Florida is sunny and warm there are certain albums that fit the mood. Toro y Moi's Causer of This is one of those albums. This album was met with immediate disdain by my young riders.

Kid- "What is this?"

Me- "Well critics call it chillwave. It's kind of one of these new sub-genres that..."

Different Kid- "This is dumb. Play something else."

Maybe try some Black Keys.

Kid- "I don't like this. Play the radio."

Me- "The what?"

Another Kid- "Play 105.5"

Me- "I don't know that one."

Still Another Kid- "It's on the radio."

Me- "Interesting. Maybe we'll listen to that when you drive."

After pretending I don't know how to work the radio I decide I'll play The Beatles. Timeless. I put on Sgt. Peppers. Some might object to this move. What would I play instead? Revolver? White Album? Come on. These kids are 5 to 12 years of age. Clearly these kids want a concise and well crafted pop album that is track for track a phenomenal record.

Literally 10 seconds into the first song.

Kid- "This is dumb."

Me- "This is The Beatles! They are (fill in with generic praise about them changing the face of music and whatnot)."

Different Kid- "Play something good. Play California Gurls"

Me- "Absolutely not."

At this point I am panic stricken. Surely I must have some musical common ground with these kids. I like good music, don't I? I have to have something more engaging than Katy Perry. In a state of panic and frenzy I put on the Stooges. The opening riff of Search and Destroy burst through the speakers and hits each kid in the face like sonic uppercut. How can you not love this song?

Kid- "Oh my gosh. This is worse!"

Me- "That's it. You are just going to have to deal with what I play."

The kids were punished with Group Autogenics I by The Books.

My entire afternoon was thrown off a little by this group of kids' blind hatred of music I enjoy and some I genuinely love. However, after having some separation I have come to the following conclusion.

Best Case Scenario- These are just kids and I am overreacting. Give them a few years and they will discover Zeppelin in high school and everything will start improving from there.

Worst Case Scenario- I'm Otto.

Surely more is happening that is worth reporting.

Br. Mike: "(looking at newspaper) Would you look at that. Must be some kind of new workout craze."

There is no better way to start your day than trying to decide whether to tell a religious brother that he is looking at a headline advertising a pole dancing class.

A glass of water a day, sir. A glass of water a day.

So when I was growing up until now I never remember my Dad ever distributing any sort of medication to myself or my siblings. Usually whenever we were feeling ill or had some kind of problem my Dad would recommend drink more water.

Kid- "Dad I have a headache."

Dad- "You aren't drinking enough water."

Kid- "My vision's blurry. I think I need glasses."

Dad- "Have you tried drinking some water."

Kid- "This stab wound really hurts."

Dad- "Clearly, you're dehydrated."

Kid- "I think I'm pregnant."

Dad- "I knew I should have explained this to you about this earlier, Josh. You don't drink nearly enough water to have a child."

I'm glad they can't fire volunteers.

Today I overcame the temptation of testing the road flares that are kept in the bus and the impulse because I had to look nice for a meeting to say to everyone I work with to " Please stop undressing me with your eyes." Professionalism is difficult.

Why no post yesterday?

So I experienced my first Florida power outage yesterday. Had I been in Charleston at the time it seems liked it would have been an ideal opportunity to throw a party like is done during a hurricane or that one time it snowed. However, in Florida all you can really do is sit on your bed with a flashlight and read comic books because all your senior citizen friends don't drive at night. Why does Florida have power outages and how often do they happen? Let my conversation with Brother Mike answer that.

Josh: So does this happen a lot.

Br. Mike: It hasn't happened for several months but it's common.

Josh: Why does it happen so much?

Br. Mike: Cause Florida is a dumpy state.

Josh: ...

Br. Mike: ...

Josh: ... Fair enough.

Old Friend. No really. It's an old person.

Ever since college I have wanted to have an old guy that just hangs out. My dream was to show up to parties and social events with the old guy and act like his presence is completely natural. I think Florida could make that happen.

Time of your life, Seniors.

Hearing Good Riddance by Green Day when around seniors graduating from high school is cliched but expected.

Hearing Good Riddance by Green Day when surrounded by senior citizens takes on a far darker and depressing tone.

Listen to this song while looking at this picture.

That was my morning. Sorry to bum you out.

To lighten the mood.

Listen to this song while looking at this picture.

New Schedule

Due to the unpopularity of last week's "No Pants Tuesday" Monday is now officially laundry day.

On Like

Facebook is one way I can kind of keep up with friends and family. The newsfeed informs me of the numerous activities and thoughts of those that are close to me as well as a number of people that might have attended my high school/college that I no longer/never communicate with. Regardless of who posts, Facebook is informative. What it has informed me of lately is that most people don't seem to understand what "Like" means.

"When you forgot to close out your bar tab and you are charged 20% but you at least remembered to get your card back the next day."

"When your bf/gf calls you by their ex's name and you break up with them."

"When you hear a joke by a comedian and it doesn't apply to you but months later something happens and now the joke applies to you and it makes the joke really funny and then you create a group about the joke as if everyone else should also have experienced said joke situation but don't give any credit to the comedian after creating the group."

These are not things people "like." These are events which take place. People like ice cream. They don't like "my pet died when I was little but it still makes me sad."

Now one could make the argument that "like"ing is the manifestation of one's desire to find a connection and be part of a community because we seem to no longer form deep, meaningful relationships and so instead our human interaction becomes based upon a quantity of superficial experiences which is validated by others creating a sense of normalcy and a communal though distant existence.

Another valid claim is that people have embraced the world of postmodernity and are ironically "like"ing these events and I just don't get it. If postmodernism has taught me anything it is simply this- "you don't get it."

The third more likely possibility is please stop it. Go read a book. Listen to music. Paint a picture. Cultivate yourself for some higher, loftier existence. There are so many better ways to express your thoughts/feelings. Nick at Night has changed. Kermit's voice isn't the same. Things are expensive. Interpol's lead singer does want to be Ian Curtis. The economy is awful. Everyone knows this. There is no reason to "like" these things. Please stop.

If you "like"d this you should post it as your facebook status as well as a tweet and get your friends to like it because I am in desperate need of validation. I'm so lonely.

And another good idea.

Aristotle once said, "At his best, man is the noblest of all animals." While Aristotle was talking about laws or justice or something, I would like to think my newest idea would also inspire such a sentiment.

I call it "Coffee Shower Time."

In the morning I tend to drag and there are two things that wake me up 1) a cup of coffee and 2) a shower. I had plenty of time to do both until recently reacquiring a reason to wake up before noon. Now I am up at 7:15 each morning and don't have time for coffee AND a shower. Thankfully, I'm clever. Cue proof.

No more morning grogginess for this guy. I'm refreshed and ready to address the adventure of the day. Some may naysay but clearly this is a good idea. Look how marketable it is (if capitalism has taught us anything- if it is marketable it is a good idea.)

Are you tired? Having difficulty staying awake for the first few hours of the day until you make it to midday nap? Do energy drinks give you tummy aches and then your stomach makes weird noises when you're sitting in a meeting and everyone hears it but no one says anything and you're embarrassed and it's really uncomfortable but what can you do? You could get more energy by going to bed earlier combined with exercise and a proper diet (lame) OR...

COFFEE SHOWER TIME!

There are a lot of things we could do to improve ourselves but isn't it better just to do what is really easy. Coffee Shower Time. It's something we can all drink to.

Free Time

Most people are probably concerned that after all the hours of volunteering in a small town in Florida I won't have anything to do in my downtime to unwind. Luckily the surrounding area has numerous museums and a boisterous night life. So don't worry about me. I have found several ways to keep myself entertained.

Books

I organized books at Catholic Charities in preparation for the after school program.

The various subjects include Religion, Science, Fiction, Science Fiction, History, Children's Literature, and Pop Culture.


My Favorites books in the library include:

-Marie Curie and Radium
-Who Shot The President? The Death of John F. Kennedy
-Bridget Jones' Diary (apparently an old volunteer thought this was a good book for the older girls)
-Star Wars: What is a Wookie? (the only book in the Sci-fi section)
-Think Again by Doug E. Fresh (yes- this Doug E. Fresh )
-Contemporary Reader (Example of Articles- Billie Holiday, The Nature of Fear, and The Black Death)

Bus... Or why I will clearly be irresistible to the opposite sex.

So part of my daily life involves driving a bus for a variety of activities. Bonus: The bus can also be used as my personal means of conveyance when neither of the minivans are available.

Blog

I can only assume that I am terribly missed by my friends and family and so I started this blog to help them. Separation often makes us forget the glaring faults of those we love- hopefully this blog will remind those loved ones of mine and help lessen the pain I am certain they feel.